I am very pissed off about something. Out of all the damn places I am moving too. It's across the street from the damn High School I went too. Whoopi dee do! I'm trying to get rid of old memories that taunt my everyday life. -_- Being at City College, my new friends remind me of my old friends. Which makes me sad for some reason. I have a friend who reminds me of my ex boyfriend and the whole energy drinking isn't helping me get over the wounds he left me. Even though I have a new boyfriend, I am still trying to get over what has happened to me. There are some things my friends from High School don't know about besides my friend Jasmine. I don't know if it was right to have told her what happened to me. o.O? Than yet, I need to start owning up to it and stop running away from it.

Maybe the move next to the school will be a good thing.... or not. >_< I'm so confused right now. About a few weeks ago I got drunk on City College campus and ended up getting suicidal thoughts. I was so close to hurting myself. I talked it over with someone and it didn't seem that he cared. >_> I want to break up my ex and his new girlfriend. I shouldn't be mean to her, because she didn't do anything to me. She's just an innocent girl. But does he really love her?? I heard he was messing around with another girl while she was gone. Who knows what he does at night school. No one is there to keep an eye on his actions. The things he tells me on the phone... Is it really true? I wrote to God to get all the negativity and anger out of my system. It felt really good, yet I still feel so angry. I hope the move helps me get over my problem. I've been holding everything in and letting life go with the flow. Instead, it builds up and I become a total wreck. I think a really long bike ride will help me. Ride away and let the wind take my problems.

Cycling has become a new hobby of mine. I just need to be careful not to over do my riding. Last time, I almost fell over because I became so weak. My heart has been having problems and I have woke up a few times having trouble breathing. I was close to going into the Emergency Room, but I told my mom to just let it go. They wont find anything wrong with my heart. They never do. Every now and then I have a minor heart attack before I go to sleep.

Any who, I hope everyone has a good day off from school and work tomorrow. Don't do anything stupid that will get you put away, lol.